Stories of Grace 

 A Personal Story of Grace | Jenny Griebenow

You’ve heard about God being strong in your weakness. Maybe that’s been pretty abstract.  Perhaps you’ve heard about experiencing God’s presence and hearing from Him, but don’t know what that looks like. Here’s my story.

I was a good kid and a great student who grew up in a church-going home. I never caused problems because I was afraid to be alone, and conflict always felt like the end of the world. So, I worked to do the things I was supposed to do and do them right. I was encouraged to dream dreams and assured by teachers and the culture alike that I had a great future and would be a big success. I took that at face value.

Unfortunately, I also thought I was supposed to figure everything out on my own, because that’s what it meant to be smart. I was a golden child, arrogant and proud.

I officially became a Christian at church camp when I was 16. I did not actually believe the Bible, though, as in didn’t take it seriously. And I did not know how to spend time with Jesus. I heard about it, but never had the slightest idea how to actually do that. If you’re like me, you have probably heard a lot about discipleship, prayer, and devotionals. Ultimately, that just turned out to be performative.

The summer before college, anxiety and depression took over as I was afraid to leave home. Once I got settled in at my small liberal arts college in Oklahoma and found friends at a campus ministry, things leveled out, and I went on being successful and winning more academic honors. However, real life after my Master’s degree was a lot more difficult than school. Looking back, I realize I was moderately depressed throughout a lot of my life. But that’s just how it was; I thought it was normal.

In my late 20s, I had my first baby. I expected no problems as nobody in my extended family ever had any. (Plus remember, I’m awesome!) But I ended up with an unexpected traumatic cesarean under general anesthesia, despite planning a natural birth. That led rapidly to severe postpartum depression and PTSD. I was stuck there for almost five months before the cloud lifted and I was myself again.

As time went on, every time the depression got bad again, what I thought I understood and had internalized about the faith and my Savior got lost. I yelled at my kids when I was stressed out, at random times, and I didn’t even apologize because I didn’t know that I should. It was so traumatic for them, but I had no idea how much it damaged them in ways they still suffer from. So much for being a success!

After years of asking my husband if I was doing enough to prove that I was a Christian and if I was working hard enough to show it,  I hit rock bottom in 2018 over a child’s difficult transition to adulthood. I had tried to win people’s favor and friendship and love and even God’s by doing the things, but it didn’t matter how hard I tried to do what was best; I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t even successfully raise a child. And figuring everything out by myself? That certainly hadn’t worked out.

After years of trying to perform and earn people’s approval, I saw no way forward. I was so anxious about everything, I stopped sleeping. Then I had delusions about whether our appliances and cars worked, and thought I was going to start a worldwide pandemic because I hadn’t cooked some chicken thoroughly enough, among others. I was in the hospital for a week, but the support and meals from friends were really a lot more helpful.  My friends still loved me, even when I didn’t love myself and knew I was unworthy.

I started taking an antidepressant. Over the next two years, I went through various medication combinations seemingly to no avail. I experienced brief, mild highs and then went back into severe depression. I could never tell when the hopelessness would overtake me again; it came back in a matter of minutes, for no obvious reason. In one of my lapses back in the pit, my amazing therapist, with whom I did EMDR to process fears and the lies I believed, asked me if I had tried a particular supplement. I was already taking it, so Paul suggested I try increasing it just a bit. That one little suggestion, that one little piece, was what I needed, and God knew it.

The only time I’ve been deeply depressed again since I made that change is when I tried getting off my other medications and just using the supplement. But this despair and failure was the gateway to life. Had I been successful at the tasks set for me, where would I be now? Arrogant and proud, same as I had always been. Being humbled was the best, because through that complete collapse, God made me new. I didn’t find the help I needed right when I thought I needed it, but God did ultimately provide it. Even the body-wrenching anxiety that used to wreck me is gone. - Jenny Griebenow

Jenny is the wife of Greg and the mom of three adult children. They have been at Sojourn since BL (before Lisle) and have served in various roles, from making coffee on the Connect Team as well as greeting, to hosting a Community Group. We're grateful for their faithful presence and ministry at Sojourn J-Town.

 A Heart for the Lost | Chad Nuss

I came to know Jesus in the fall of 2000. When I gave my life to Jesus, He gave me an excitement for evangelism. I realized the gospel was the answer to the many questions I was wrestling with, but I also knew the gospel was the message of love, hope, and forgiveness that the people around me needed. I sensed that God wanted me to not only think seriously about evangelism but also practice it. I did not grow up in church and started following Jesus just after I finished college. I was surrounded by people who did not know the Lord. So I began sharing the gospel with my family, friends, and coworkers. 

My early experiences of evangelism were awkward, confrontational, and lacked tact and grace. I approached complete strangers on the street, instigated confrontational conversations with atheist coworkers, and started arguments with resistant family members. I tried to get up the nerve to street preach but settled for passing out tracts and reading the Bible in public. I carried picture stills of a bloodied Jesus from the movie Passion of the Christ hoping to spark a conversation with people. I even secretly stuck a Bible in one of my family members' bed mattresses in a naive hope that God would use that to convert them!

In my attempts to faithfully share the message of Jesus, my problem was I had a lot of passion but lacked compassion. But the Lord is faithful to use blunt and clumsy instruments. He is faithful not only to use us despite our inadequacies, but also faithful to refine us through practice and experience. Over time, the Lord taught me how to meet people where they are by reminding me of who I was before meeting Christ. I needed space to wrestle with my questions about life and I needed someone who I knew really cared for me to help me answer those questions. 

If you're interested in evangelism, I encourage you to remember two words: content and context. To share the gospel, we must know the  content of our message. The gospel can be summarized in four points and one response: 

1. God created everything - including you! 

2. All of us have decided to live life on our own terms and therefore we have sinned against God

3. God loves us so much He sent His son Jesus Christ to live, die, and rise from death to forgive and restore us

4. God is bringing resurrection and restoration to the entire world and offers this to each one of us. Therefore, we are invited to respond by turning over our lives to Him by repenting of our sins and trusting Him by faith. 

To practice evangelism, we also must remember our context. First, we need to pay attention to the context of our immediate situation. Every person and every conversation will be unique. Some conversations call for a listening ear, some an encouraging word, some a loving rebuke, and some a direct appeal. It takes wisdom to discern which approach is best but the only way to learn this is through experience. Do not be afraid to make mistakes, to accidentally offend, to miss an opportunity, or to completely drop the ball. The Lord is patient with us and is willing to use any exercise of faith no matter how clumsy or insufficient. 

Second, we need to pay attention to the context of our lives as a whole. We all go through seasons in our lives. I have been through seasons where I have had chances to share the gospel multiple times a day for months on end. But I have also been through other seasons where I had absolutely no desire to share and no opportunities for weeks and months on end. 

Currently, I am in a season in which I am home a lot helping with our special needs kids so I don't have as many opportunities for evangelism. However, I am an artist and the Lord is leading me to create artwork that inspires people to contemplate life and God. I self-published two graphic novels based on the Bible and philosophy and now working on a third. I am also working on a series of large drawings based on biblical themes that I will soon display in pop-up art shows around the city as a means of fostering new relationships and possible gospel opportunities. I am trying to leverage the gifts He has given me in my current context and season.

Some of us work in contexts surrounded by unbelievers, some of us are stay-at-home parents with little contact with anyone, some of us are around fellow Christians all of the time. The practice of evangelism will look differently for everyone at different times and seasons of their lives. The goal is to remain faithful in whatever season we are in and know that even in the most isolated situation the Lord can provide opportunities to share the gospel in ways we could never have imagined. Remain faithful and know that as we draw closer to the Lord, He will draw people closer to us to share His message with them. Blessings. - Chad Nuss



Chad is the husband of Elizabeth and dad to Georgia, Noah, Silas, and Eli. They have been at Sojourn for many years and have served in various roles, from making coffee on the Connect Team, to serving our youth at S2,  to hosting a Community Group, and leading discussion in our Alpha ministry. We're grateful for their faithful presence and ministry at Sojourn J-Town.